Three’s company, four’s awesome!
Landlord @ May 15, 2008 # No Comment Yet
One night, my girlfriend and I decided to get drunk with a girlfriend of hers, and her husband. I had just gotten paid so I didn’t care if I spent a lot of money on alcohol. The dude bought a load too… liquor, mudslide mix, wine coolers and beer. We starting mixing everything like idiots and got slammed, luckily we brought a camera with us. The girls got wild and stripped for us and ended up giving us head while we sat their drinking beer and playing chess. A night to remember.
Submitted by Mark Redmond
More on page 61
Hello Gran!
Landlord @ May 13, 2008 # No Comment Yet
After a cancelled rubgy match, me and a couple of mates began drinking at the respectable time of 1 o’clock, and by 7 o’clock we were all a bit worse for wear. By by 11 o’clock (chucking out time) I was bundled into a car and taken home, where I turned on my television to reveal a Channel 5 blue movie. Now sexually excited, I began to “beat my meat” and imagine my surprise when I was rudely interupted by my gran who I had been warned would be sleeping in my room. After an embarrasing pause she ran out screaming and fetched my parents, at which point I had to explain my actions, then I passed out! Breakfast the next morning was a surreal experience as you can imagine.
Submitted by Phillip Evans
More on page 60
Smoking damages your health!
Landlord @ May 10, 2008 # No Comment Yet
I was at this really cool party with a couple of my friends and my cousin. There were probably 100 people in this 3 room apartment, and definitely enough alcohol to go around. So, after about 4 grey goose citron shooters, and 4 drinks (all containing massive amounts of alcohol) I decided to work my way through the crowd to go smoke a cigarette. As I get into the “smokers” hallway, I’m surprised to see a place on the wall for me to lean against. After about 5 minutes of talking to people I have never met, and will probably never remember, the wall shattered from behind me. It turned out that I was leaning against the window, and it shattered all over the floor! My friends looked at me in shock, and my cousin immediately left, because she didn’t want to get blamed for it, and I was left explaining why the window was in about a million places all over the floor. The guy was cool with it, but I guess the cops weren’t because they showed up about 10 minutes later. I didn’t even notice I had a 3-inch rip in my jeans until my friend pointed it out on the way to the car!
Submitted by Maria
More on page 59
Take my number, and bra!
Landlord @ May 7, 2008 # No Comment Yet
Me and my friend Miranda got really drunk and as our friend was driving us home we pulled up to a car of hot guys, took off our shirts and bras, put our phone numbers in the cups and threw it over to them. They called us the next morning… Miranda is now married to one of them.
Submitted by Z and M
More on page 58
Car for sale: Has arse print!
Landlord @ May 6, 2008 # No Comment Yet
One night me and a couple buddies were getting sloshed because my friend had just broken it off his two year long relationship. We then went driving around in my car. Soon we found ourselves at a red light with a car full of hotties next to us, so my buddy gave them a full pressed moon on the back window, and left a nasty sweaty ass print on my window. I sold the car a couple weeks later with the ass print still on, he paid extra for that!
Submitted by Cody
More on page 57
Dance for me baby!
Landlord @ May 3, 2008 # No Comment Yet
My friends decided to take me out bar hopping, the last night before I moved out of state. I got so trashed that I went over to this cute guy and started flirting with him. He flirted back, and then I asked him if he wanted me to give him a lap dance. He didn’t have to think he grabbed hold of me and said, “Dance for me baby”. I began to grind into the crotch of his pants. We were really getting into it. I also apparently gave the guy my name and number, because he called me the next morning to thank me for the crotch grind. From then on I am the designated driver.
Submitted by Lori Ann
More on page 56
Lock in!
Landlord @ May 1, 2008 # No Comment Yet
There was this one time when me and my friends went to a bar. We had a lot to drink and couldn’t even leave our seats. We passed out and woke up in the bar… but it was 9:00 AM and the bar was closed. We were stuck in there the whole day. By the time the bar opened, half the alcohol was gone!
Submitted by Crispy
More on page 55