After a cancelled rubgy match, me and a couple of mates began drinking at the respectable time of 1 o’clock, and by 7 o’clock we were all a bit worse for wear. By by 11 o’clock (chucking out time) I was bundled into a car and taken home, where I turned on my television to reveal a Channel 5 blue movie. Now sexually excited, I began to “beat my meat” and imagine my surprise when I was rudely interupted by my gran who I had been warned would be sleeping in my room. After an embarrasing pause she ran out screaming and fetched my parents, at which point I had to explain my actions, then I passed out! Breakfast the next morning was a surreal experience as you can imagine.
Submitted by Phillip Evans
Landlord @ May 13, 2008